One year ago, the UK voted to leave the EU. A lot may have happened since then from one prime minister resigning to one calling an embarrassing snap election, but there’s no getting away from the fact Brexit is still well and truly happening. As negotiations tick up a gear in Brussels, here’s our guide to marking the one year anniversary with a Brexit bash that both Remainers and Leavers can enjoy.
Nail the fancy dress
Every good party has a strong fancy dress theme, and ours is no different. Why not have everyone dress like the liberal media elite? Channel the Guardian columnist Owen Jones by throwing on your favourite knit jumper and best collar shirt if you can’t be bothered to make much of an effort.
If you fancy trying a slightly more involved costume, you could always dress as an expert– the black sheep of modern Britain. Don’t be surprised if other party guests decide they’ve had enough of you though.
Other ideas include taking a leaf out of Her Majesty The Queen’s book, or, everyone’s favorite prop from the bitter referendum campaigning, the Brexit tour bus.
Craft the perfect Facebook invite
Make it short, snappy and deliciously punny. In other words, make it strong and stable.
Before making too many naughty references to soft and hard Brexits maybe consider the type of party you’re having. After all, it might make people think this is a very different type of party.
We’d also recommend turning off event wall posts to save yourself from all the arguments about immigration targets, the EU membership fee, or how much money the EU brings to South Yorkshire every year. (The answer: probably a lot).
Revamp your living room
Think starving 1970s Thatcherite Britain meets London’s left-wing “I-told-you-so” intelligentsia. Plaster “Brexit Means Brexit” and “No Deal is Better than a Bad Deal” posters over the cracks and mold on your walls, and fill your bathtub with Monopoly bills because squalor and hyperinflation are a right laugh. Buy a couple of nice vintage chandeliers and scatter copies of the Treaty of Lisbon here and there to switch things up a bit.
Brexit refreshments for British people
Bake the inevitable Union Jack cake. Serve “Cameron-lised” apples, in honor of the former British PM who started this mess. Speaking of, serve Eton mess and “falling” pound cake too.
Most importantly, banish European drinks from your home. Fond of Belgian beer? Stick to British bitter instead.
Take back control of your playlist
Every house party needs a great playlist – and your Brexit Bash is no exception. Favor classic British tracks that speak directly to the situation. Our top pick? This.
Certain to please Leavers and Remainers alike, The Clash’s hit really digs deep into the heart of Brexit, so shut your eyes and let la douleur exquise of this song wash over you. How to follow it up? Well, what is Brexit really if not a really messy break-up…
Who doesn’t like a bit of James Blunt? If you haven’t already, we recommend you follow him on Twitter by the way. His hit song about breaking up with Europe is moving and heartfelt. Plus he was in the Army at one point which surely qualifies him to soundtrack the upcoming battle with bureaucrats in Brussels.
Channel the spirit of Brexit Britain with everything you do
And by everything, we mean everything. Deliberately don’t invite your neighbours (after all, we live in a divided nation). Break up with your partner, only to change your mind two seconds later. Swing from laughing uncontrollably to crying fiercely. Drink every time anyone says a fact or has a sensible opinion. Drink everytime someone tells a lie. Drink non-stop. Drink, drink, drink. Drink until you forget we ever voted for Brexit in the first place. Drink so much you wake up in the morning with a splitting headache. Congratulations, now you know how it feels to try and negotiate leaving the EU.
An amended draft was first published in TopUniversities on 26/6/17